A Pastoral Letter For When God Seems Far Away
We all go through times when God feels distant, and moments of silence or emptiness can be unsettling, but they don’t mean He has left us for faith is more than fleeting feelings; it’s built on the truth of who God is and what He has promised. Seasons of distance can actually become times of growth, helping us develop deeper trust, stronger roots, and greater maturity in our walk with Him.
Dear Emma
Everyone goes through times in relationships when it feels close but then a little more distant. All our relationships here have a beginning and an ending – a bit like sandwiches with a top and a bottom with varying content in between! A relationship with God is different. It has a definite start when we first decide to trust Him and start the conversation. Then come times of closeness, interspersed with times like you’re feeling now of God being far away, but a true relationship with God never ends.
Fickle Feelings
When we were teenagers, our feelings and emotions ruled over us. This got us into all sorts of trouble, worries and broken relationships. As we mature, we realise that more balanced decisions come from being more objective with a fact-based approach. Feelings need to follow facts and faith rather than lead the way. At the beginning, you put your faith in God based on facts – the birth, death and attested resurrection of Jesus by over 500 people. You took the many promises of God’s love for you in the Bible and made them your own. You trusted that God is for you and calls you His own.
Maturity Takes Time
When you lose your bearings on a walk, you need to go back to your last known reference point. It is possible to get a little lost in your spiritual journey with God. When that happens, you need to get back to a known spiritual reference point. This could be the last moment you felt close to God or grounded in faith—that could be described more personally as a spiritual anchor, last known grace moment, or even a faith milestone.
Becoming a mature follower of Christ means to become more like Him. Consider all the hardships Jesus went through, times of being alone in the wilderness, of being misunderstood and even feeling abandoned by God His Father as death approached. No wonder that growing up in God can be painful.
- ‘When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. But when I became an adult, I set aside childish ways’ – 1 Corinthians 13:11
- ‘Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything’ – James 1:4
Growing Up in God
God is committed to you becoming mature. Through the work of Christ, you have been given many resources to become mature:
- So Christ himself gave the apostles, the prophets, the evangelists, the pastors and teachers, to equip his people for works of service, so that the body of Christ may be built up until we all reach unity in the faith and in the knowledge of the Son of God and become mature, attaining to the whole measure of the fullness of Christ. Then we will no longer be infants, tossed back and forth by the waves, and blown here and there by every wind of teaching and by the cunning and craftiness of people in their deceitful scheming. Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will grow to become in every respect the mature body of him who is the head, that is, Christ. From him the whole body, joined and held together by every supporting ligament, grows and builds itself up in love, as each part does its work’ – Ephesians 4:11-16
- ‘…being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus’ – Philippians 1:6
Emma, God is Near
To grow up in God is to move from milk to solid food—from spiritual infancy to maturity. It’s not about perfection, but about persistence. It’s choosing to trust when feelings fade, to obey when clarity is absent, and to love when it costs something.
• It means letting scripture shape your instincts.
• It means allowing grace to soften your judgments.
• It means walking with God not just in the garden, but through the wilderness.
Spiritual maturity isn’t a destination—it’s a rhythm of surrender, renewal, and trust. And sometimes, the very feeling of distance is the soil where deeper roots are formed.
Some Pointers
Feeling distant from God can be tough, but you’re not alone in that experience. Many people go through seasons where they struggle to feel His presence. Here are a few things that might help:
Remember what God has already done – Reflecting on past experiences where you felt close to Him can be reassuring. The Bible is full of stories of people who felt abandoned but later saw God’s faithfulness.
Keep seeking Him – Even when it feels like He’s silent, continuing to pray, read scripture, and worship can help bridge the gap.
Find meaning in the struggle – Sometimes, distance can be an opportunity for growth. It can deepen your faith and reliance on Him.
Talk to others – Sharing your feelings with trusted friends, mentors, or a faith community can provide encouragement and perspective.
Trust faith over feelings – Feelings can fluctuate, but God’s truth remains constant. Leaning on faith means believing in His promises even when emotions tell a different story. Scripture reminds us that we walk by faith, not by sight (2 Corinthians 5:7).
Deal With Three Killers – Doubt, Disappointment and Cynicism
I’m sure that you will have experienced these ‘three rogues’ in some measure. ‘They’ torment every child of God from time to time. To help you further, I suggest you check out these three helpful Boosters from C4L to help you when ‘they’ raise their heads:
Doubt Dasher– https://connect4life.org.uk/c4l-boosters/when-in-doubt/
Disappointment Defeater – https://connect4life.org.uk/c4l-boosters/disappointment/
Cynicism Crusher – https://connect4life.org.uk/c4l-boosters/danger-cynicism-at-work/
Emma, trust God and you will come out of this ‘the other side’, stronger, more mature and able to help others grow in God.
John Piper is a Pastor and writer who wrote a letter to a guy called Brandon who asked a similar question: ‘What do I do when God has seemed silent for a really long time? I feel almost no joy. I go repeatedly to the Scriptures and most often walk away still discouraged and unhelped. I pray continuously and feel like I get no response. I am so cast down, Pastor John. What do I do?’ You may find what he writes is of further help. https://www.desiringgod.org/interviews/what-to-do-when-god-feels-distant
A final promise for you:
‘No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord’ – Romans 8:37-39
BYU Hymn – Nearer my God to Thee
Praying for you Emma, and others going through times like this,
Oggy